“The time for thundershirts has passed, the sky booms are upon us,” Potato Chip concluded. “Lick your loved ones’ faces, and make peace with your God. There may be no treats tomorrow."
Read MoreAs he spoke on Iranian state television, he appeared shaken as he recounted the dazzling array of loops, corkscrews, and barrel rolls that the Blue Angels executed. "Did you see their burst formation? We cannot stand against this power."
Read More"People shouldn't be worried about us drunk driving. They should be worried about the underground street racing circuit she started.”
Read More“Juneteenth commemorates the day in 1865 when [REDACTED BY ORDER OF GOV. DE SANTIS]. Although President Lincoln [REDACTED BY ORDER OF GOV. DE SANTIS] two years earlier, it wasn’t until General Grant issued General Order Number 3 that [REDACTED BY ORDER OF GOV. DE SANTIS].“
Read More“Why the hell did it have to be B.A.? B.A. is a hero! He’s a champion of children everywhere, he drinks his milk, and he sure as hell don’t cause no respiratory problems!” said Mr. T, referring to himself in the third person. “Unless you need him to,” he added, with a twinkle in his eye.
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