Struggling Millenial Realizes He's Bad at Job

By Mitchell Trachtenberg

CHICAGO, IL - After spending nearly three full years in his desired field, local millennial Mitchell Trubisky realized that he's actually pretty bad at his job.

"This is literally all I studied in school, what the hell was I even doing all that time?" said Trubisky, the University of North Carolina alum, who is clearly in over his head by the added pressure of a professional career.

"It used to be that if I skipped a class here or there, nobody would ever really know and it was no big deal, said Trubisky as he sat down for a quick brunch of avocado toast. "Now my coworkers are pissed at me, my manager takes me aside literally once a week, and four million strangers are threatening to kill me on Twitter."

Many are quick to point out that Trubisky is just 25 years old, and it's completely normal at that age to be unsure of what the future holds.

"We are so proud of our Mitchell, and we will be no matter what. Though maybe this whole football thing isn't for him," said Jeanne, his mother. "He's already given it three years, maybe it's time to take a break, and go into law school like his father did."

However, Trubisky was hesitant when asked if this realization will spark a career change.

"Honestly, it probably won't," Trubisky said. "Pretty much everyone in my company is just making it up as they go, and they all still have their jobs. Why can't I?"