Naperville Dad Attempts to Buy Daughter’s Love with Seventh Pony

By Stuart Allard

NAPERVILLE, IL - With the holiday season fast approaching, Naperville real estate broker Kirk Shannon hopes the 7th pony he buys for his daughter is enough to purchase her love.

“She loves ponies,” said Shannon, who incorrectly believes his daughter is in either second or third grade.

Shannon was perusing Equine.com, “the Amazon of horses,” after a quick Amazon search failed to turn up what he was seeking.

“The first time I tried to buy a horse for [Ashalee], I looked at Target’s web site first. Looking back, that was kind of dumb. Never mind that my daughter was only 18 months old. Now I’m practically an expert.”

Shannon is undeterred in his quixotic search.

“It’s more burdensome than it looks,” said Shannon. “The local real estate market has made it tough to purchase, say, one pony annually. In a buyer’s market, however I might be able to buy a pony on her birthday and Christmas.”

“My single greatest concern is that I’ll accidentally buy a pony [Ashalee] already has,” Shannon grumbled as he looked through breeds in an online horse catalog. “She pays attention to that sort of thing.”

“I figure I’ll buy at least three more,” said Shannon. “Ten is a nice, round number, Plus, there’s a ridiculous amount of upkeep.”